Musicology.

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 I have been on a major music kick lately and have been trying to find different things to listen to. I have been craving music with a little bit of a rustic feel to it, songs with violins and banjos and beautifully sung lyrics. I have been listening to a lot of nickel creek, art in manila, and edward sharpe & the magnetic zeros. Luckily I have a job where I am exposed to all sorts of music during the day, things I never would have heard if the playlist hadn't had it on it.

My favorite songs right now are:

Roll away your stone by Mumford & Sons.

Generator 1st Floor & Generator 2nd Floor by Freelance Whales

Camera by Rabbit! 


 I highly recommend these!

all hallows eve.

  I decided to do my costume the cheap way this year by only using things I had on hand, enter Chelsea from Seablanket... She did an amazing tutorial on how to make your own lady bird costume over on A Beautiful Mess. I followed her tutorial and added a few of my own tweaks like making a dress from scratch instead of using a pillowcase (because my boobs will NOT fit in one of those things) and using a slightly brighter fabric because its what I had in my house. I also decided to add an owl mask to make the costume a little more obvious, so I made one from the Martha Stewart website. I didn't have any crepe paper or glue for some reason so I made mine out of cardboard and construction paper and then stitched all the pieces together. Yes, I stitched paper together. It actually turned out pretty well but I will have to wait until later tonight to post pictures of the actual costume I made because I have absolutely no idea where my camera is and its 5 am.

Day two.

So I am attempting to change the amount I eat as well and today I cut my intake down to 1500 calories. All of it in fruit and vegetables and some whole wheat toast and egg whites. I have upped my intake of water to almost a gallon  a day. I know I should probably be drinking more. Well a good start so far. We shall see how it goes.

Day one.

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 Today is the first day of my new way of eating... Going full time vegetarian again for health benefits. I have been slowly weening myself off of meat for about a month now. Eating less and less every day until I can get down to only vegetables and tofu and a little whole wheat thrown in for good measure. I have also been doing the p90x workout but I am thinking it may be a little intense for me and I might switch to just running/biking again for about an hour each day until I can get my stamina back up. I am moving to Georgia next year and would really like to get into shape so that I can ride my bike around the campus of my new school and possibly around the area I am going to live with Ben strapped into a baby seat on the back without feeling exhausted. I think giving myself a little under a year to lose weight and just get healthy in general is enough time to change the way I live before I move. I want my move to be all about changing my life for the better, every part of it. I may be posting photo updates and weight stats but I will wait and see how things go first. Wish me luck! 

p.s. for those of you in need of some amazing mixes for running/biking or whatever go here !

My favorite.

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I did a sick, sick thing to my love.
My lack of loyalty, it swallowed her up.
And she cooks me food.
She squirmed and turned like a skeleton key.

She left her man unattended to me.
Don't call me that.
Don't claim you love me
cause you know that ain't true.

And you're finally free
to twist and turn like a skeleton key.

You've gotta let me know.
You've gotta let me know.

I did a horrible thing to that girl.
I bread my misery and drowned it in her.
And she got me high,
And I hardly noticed there were tears in her eyes.

And I miss you less and less everyday.
It's true the whiskys helped to wash you away.

And it's clear to see,
You're nothing special.
You're a skeleton key.

You've gotta let me know.
You've gotta let me know.
You've gotta let me know.
You've gotta let me know.

Whooo! 


 This is a beautiful song by Margot and the nuclear so & so's. I am completely in love with them and their music. The lyrics in every song astound me. 


 I posted this one because I have been having relationship issues in my life and I feel like this says everything I have been feeling. I recently broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years to date a boy who I have been interested in for about 5 years and then he decided that he didn't want to commit to just me. I feel like I am the girl in the song. I feel like his   unwillingness to be in a monogamous relationship with was eating me up. The boy who I was ready to commit myself too after years of him begging me to be with him decided that now that I am free he doesn't want me anymore. I have lost the appeal of being unavailable. I thought I was different and he wouldn't treat me like he has treated all of the other girls. I thought I meant something to him since I have been there through thick and thin for him, but he pulled away as soon as I got close. Last weekend we spent both days hanging out with each other, he finally met my close group of friends. The friends that I never even introduced to my ex. The friends that I guard closely because they are my sanctuary. I let him in and he fucked me over. 
 On sunday I went to work and he spent all day lounging at my house and later told me he has never felt comfortable enough with someone to do that, that he always feels awkward in other peoples homes but not with me. That with me it was different. Then on tuesday, after not talking to him since I took him home on sunday, he tells me he is having a rough week and needs a couple days alone. I told him that was fine because I have been feeling stressed because of having to deal with my ex about our custody arrangement for our 2 year old. Last night I called boy to invite him out with my friends and I and he said he would just like to stay in and watch movies at his house. I told him that was fine and maybe I would see him the next day. We end our conversation on a pleasant note. I go out to dinner and a show with my friends at a club in the city. We decide to walk over to a nearby club and see some of our friends. As I am talking to my friend I feel like someone is looking at me so I turn around and suddenly I am eye to eye with boy. Boy who said he was at home watching movies alone. Boy who said he needed time because stress. 
 He sees me and proceeds to act like he didn't and tries to walk past. I pull him in for a pseudo hug and whisper "fuck you. i'm done" in his ear. He started yammering on going "wait... no, no , no. that's not how this is supposed to happen. just wait.... i will be right back." I turn around and tell my friends what just happened and they are both angry now so we move to another spot near the bar so he can't find us. I finally run into him again by the bathrooms and he says his friend came over and dragged him out. I tell him that I believe that but I am angry because this "friend" is his ex...
  He has a cycle for his relationships and I know it because I have seen him do it time and time again. To every single girl he has dated since we have known each other.  I am going to admit something I am not proud of... I know his pattern because I have been "the other woman" for almost every relationship he was in... He has broken up with girl after girl for me or called me while he was dating somebody and lied to them about who he was talking to on the phone. I was obsessed/in love with this boy and he made me think what we were doing was okay. And now I am the girl he is "dating" so his ex has assumed my role of being in the background. I think this time it is really over between us. He knows I am angry and I don't think I would ever trust him to be faithful because this is how he does things. It makes me sad because he is somebody I have AMAZING chemistry with but I am not willing to let him walk all over me because we get along well. I will mourn this relationship mainly for the loss of our friendship but in the end I will be better off.

sewing away my night.

a few weeks ago i went on a thrift store excursion with my friends. we went to smaller towns and scouted out all of the best antique and secondhand stores. i found these amazing doilies and decided i wanted to make pillows out of them. i was worried they would end up looking old ladyish but i think it turned out fine!

this was the first one i made and i realized i want to make the next one a lot larger so that the doily is centered on the pillow instead of touching the edges. i think this one will go on my bed for now...

cuddlemonster.

 he has been very clingy lately. if i am on the computer he will grab my arm and hug it and start kissing it and going "thank you, thank you" and patting my hand. it's not like he doesn't get a lot of attention, he is an only child! so i am not sure where this is coming from but i love it.

portfolio pieces.

I have been given the task of making an entirely new portfolio for my school by February. I am going to school for design, specifically accessory and apparel design. I started sketching out some ideas for larger pieces for my portfolio, I am going to draw them out and then have my sister scan them into photoshop and enhance the colors and sharpen the lines and just make them look like they belong in a portfolio worthy of this school rather then my sketchbook that is buried under clothes in my backseat.

love them.

my new favorite band is Rabbit. hands down. my two year old loves them as well. during their song "magic they sing "who's got the magic? well i do" and he always screams "i got it! i got it!". love little kids and their antics. anyway please do me a favor and listen to their amazing music over on good ol' myspace. :)
Camera by Rabbit

coincidence?

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Lately I have been thinking about taking a trip to Pittsburgh because I read "The Memory Keepers Daughter" which takes place there and I have actually heard a bunch of great things about how the city is being revitalized and it seems like a place I would like to visit. I also considered going to art school there once upon a time.
 Well, today design*sponge posted a city guide for Pittsburgh of all places. They posted so many reasons for me to visit that I think this may be where I go for spring break (I am not into the traditional go to Mexico spring break) and I may take my best friend along with me because she lives in another state and I am getting ready to move even further away from her next July and we'd really like to take a friend trip before all of that happens.

disappointed.

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  Sometimes you wonder how you never noticed that a person is a complete and utter douche bag...
 I have come to realize recently that sometimes the people you think you are the closest to are the ones that will end up hurting you the most. I am so very hurt and disappointed by your actions, sometimes I can't believe you are the same person that I was in love with for 3 years.

 3 years of lies and cheating and doing things behind my back. And now you are doing the same things to our child. A child I could NEVER imagine hurting in any way. He deserves everything and you have given him nothing. I don't expect you to be a real father to him because you never were but at the very least I would expect for you to call and maybe ask how he is doing or maybe offer to pay for things once in awhile. Except you are doing none of these things. I haven't heard from you for days and the only things I know of your life are from useless shit you post on Facebook. Your sister telling her friend that your entire family is going on a trip to Disneyworld, one you never offered to take your son on, one you probably weren't even going to tell me about until you got home.
 It's alright though because by your being absent from our lives, we are becoming stronger people. I never thought I was capable of being a single parent, which is why I stayed with you for so long. I thought that he would take this transition hard, that not living with you would be the worst thing for him, but to my surprise (and frankly, my delight) he has shown me that he doesn't need you. He only needs me. I can be everything for this little boy. I have already proven that I don't need you to help me pay for a home or a car or for food or clothing or anything else he needs to live a decent life. I have moved on while you have regressed. You moved back in with your parents while I moved into a townhouse. Something you thought I was not capable of doing on my own. You ride a bike to class everyday while I pay for my own car. You can't even maintain a real job while going to school and I work full time and take 15 hours of classes every week while taking care of our son. You have, in your awful ways, made me realize that I am capable of doing whatever I want. I thank you for that, without you I probably never would have realized how strong I am or how strong my baby will be because of having to deal with someone like you.

sigh...

Mad Men has quickly become of my favorite shows. It is well written and styled wonderfully. It makes me think I am in the wrong generation, fashion-wise, I mean. The women are all impeccably dressed and behave so gracefully. I wish that girls of my age would learn a thing or two from this show and be a little more classy.

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 Back to the fashion, it is amazing, simply put. Betty Draper is always dressed to the nines even though she is at home almost all day. She wears heels to cook and clean in. I could never do that. In researching their outfits I found out that AMC actually has a Mad Men fashion blog devoted to the show telling you how they style everything. I love it. I also love the sets. They have inspired me to go back to school for interior design and set design so I can do something like that. Amy Wells is my hero.

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speechless.

this dress is amazing. as an avid seamstress i hope to one day be good enough to sew something as wonderful as this...

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benjamin riley.

its always fun to reminisce...

ikea tent and train set. he lovesss them. 

so much that he can't stop moving long enough for me to take a decent picture...

eating at mellow mushrooms in warner robins, ga with my mom. 

ben's first time in the ocean. he loved it. he did not want to get out even though it was freezing. 

alligator at the crab shack restaurant on tybee island.

ben was fascinated by them. i'm pretty sure he would have jumped right in there if he had been given the opportunity.

he completely ignored the big fake one that was scaring all of the other kids. 

pretty sure he is trying to figure out how to open the dishwasher in my mom's kitchen in this picture. he succeeded. 

new space.

i moved into a new townhouse and now i feel like all of my old furniture needs some sprucing up.
i still need to paint my coffee table but i'm not sure what color yet, so i have turned my attention to my couch.
i am thinking of doing something like this...

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my couch is made of similar fabric and is a dark brown color, so i think this would look great.
also if i just tack them in place then i can easily remove the doilies later if i get tired of them.

outdoor dining...

so i recently moved out of my quaint house into a charming town-home, and am now in need of cute furniture for my balcony area. i am thinking of going with a french bistro meets english cafe look.

only $80 at target

what do you think? 

Music my love.

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I love love love Inara George. 
She is a musical genius. Check out her band The Bird and The Bee. She also does some solo stuff that I love.

fontself.com

claymation

i am watching a claymation movie called Mary & Max. it is about an 8 year old girl named mary who lives in australia and through a few odd happenings comes to be pen pals with a man named max who lives in new york, max also has aspergers syndrome so it makes it a little more interesting. this movie is meant for adults, not children! i love it so far.

Abandoned.

oh faithful blog i feel i have abandoned you, but i am here now.

i am here to report that i am moving out of my house that i shared with my ex and into an apartment that i will share with my 2 year old son. which means new bedding. which means i can allow myself to splurge on something nice for just me. enter the doodle bed linens from cb2. i want these. i need these. i am buying them next week. 

i have the dark wood hemnes bed from ikea so these will look lovely on it.

new favorite. thanks to jess over at heartthrobs & villains

oliver + s makes me swoon.

oliver + s

watching house, sewing baby girl dresses.
i want to practice my dressmaking skills but i don't want to waste yards and yards of fabric so i decided to make dresses for little girls and babies.
genius? i know. hah.

Australia, My Love.

this beautiful work is by stuart mclachlan .

i have a bit of an obsession with australian designers lately... just go check out the design files .

you will see what i mean.

polyvore fashion sets.

Picture of Success by greybirds featuring MM Couture dresses

Loopy Loopy Love by greybirds featuring Nine West bags

The best years of our lives by greybirds featuring kate spade jewelry

My best friend's girl. by greybirds featuring Juicy Couture dresses

Working Girl by greybirds featuring Nine West

computer down!

SAD DAY.
My computers hard drive died. I have only had it for 3 months.
I got it for Christmas to replace my other computer that was accidentally fried when it wasn't plugged in to a surge protector.  
Disappointing.
It is at Best Buy being repaired. But until then I have no way to update my little online diary.
My boyfriends computer also decided to die at the same time as mine. 
Although he had more warning then I did since his battery light has been flashing for around 6 months now. 
Boys don't like to plan ahead and order said battery when they might still have some life left in the one that is in their computer. They like to wait until the last minute, mainly until the computer has died and they have mid-terms the next week and "oh no! what will they ever do without their laptop!?". 
Frustration seems to be the theme of this post. Mainly with technology and my boyfriends inability to plan ahead. 
I wish I could just type this thing up on an old portable typewriter.

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ripped off.

I am not here to bad mouth craft stores, as a matter of fact I actually love nothing more than going to one and browsing all of the amazing things they sell. What I do not like is the fact that absolutely everything is marked up by 300%. I know this because I have worked in several over the years and they are all the same. The other day I bought 4 bags of this stuff for $3 for 12 OUNCES.

(Ignore that the bag says 20 oz., only picture I could find.)

Then I stumbled upon this website. 

Where you can order polyfil in bulk for $2.50 a POUND. Yes, you heard me right. $2.50 a POUND. Not only is it .50 less then what I paid for 12 oz., you actually get 4 more oz included in that price. Sigh. 

I also found out I can buy a bulk case of 24 pillow forms from them for around $60. If I was to buy 24 pillow forms from a craft store where they are sold for around $6-10 apiece I would end up paying upwards of $240. I decided I am going to start buying all of my craft supplies from online suppliers where I can buy them in bulk for much less than I would pay at a retail store.

Lesson Learned?  I'd say so.

sometimes he is crazy...

i am not sure where he gets all of this energy or where he stores it in such a little body.

nonstop allllllll day.

overdue.

this is how i wrapped my presents this year. 

and yes i realize it is february and i am doing a post about christmas. 

i just figured out how to upload photos to my new laptop. i am lazy and sometimes things take me eons to figure out when they really only take a few minutes of real effort.

anyway. i wrapped all of my presents in brown craft paper and bought/made fabric and felt ribbon to wrap around them. 

i added a sprig of holly to this from the bushes that grow outside our front door. 

(also this is a crocheted necklace from wren handmade and it is amazing. i gave it to my boyfriends mother)

and last but not least the cookies my sister and i made for our coworkers. 

nom nom nom.

painting my living room!

yes this me and my babeh playing with a box. ignore me and look at the sliver of wall you can see behind me and notice it is painted a purplish grey. i tried it out and didn't like it so we painted...again.

here is the room with one coat of paint. 

already a million times better and i haven't even finished painting yet. i still need a second coat and to paint the trim a glossy white. 

it's so preeeetty. i love it. ok back to painting, and yes i am painting at 4 am because boyfriend and baby are fast asleep. 

light up my life.

this light is from uptown thrift. it cost me $9.99

i am planning to hang it above my dining room table once i am done fixing it up.

so far it looks like this...

i ordered some light bulbs that are amazing looking from school house electric . 

i figure with the open shade i needed something a little more interesting and design savvy then just the regular compact fluorescents that we have in every other light in our house.

 i am making baby steps towards turning this house into what i want it to be after having lived here for 3 years. no big deal. haha. 

polyvore

                             
                                                            Dream Room by greybirds on Polyvore.com

i wish this was my room.
this is how i would arrange it in my current bedroom.

i would put the bed on the same wall as the bedroom door, the little branch table on the same wall as my closet doors with the chair next to it with the mirror hanging above the table. the armoire would go in the corner at an angle and then i would use the painting on the wall next to the bed with the small window on it. the lamps would go on either side of the bed on some small white tables. and to finish off the room id layer in the soft chenille rug and the curtains. 

swedish design makes my heart go pitter patter...

This is what we currently have in our dining room (minus the bench):

It was a gift from my boyfriends Grandfather.

It was really very sweet and he knows we need help furnishing our house but he bought them without asking us about our other furniture and it just doesn't fit in. So I am painting the top of the table white to match the rest and replacing those round back chairs with something square.

I hate the chairs. I have to replace them before I lose my mind. So I have been looking at other options and this chair was the winner:

ingolf

I need these chairs to spice up my dining room. They are from Ikea, of course, and only $50 apiece right now. I looked on every other site I could think of for cheap cross back chairs that still look decent and I kept coming back to these so I guess I will be driving to Frisco to pick a few up in February along with my new bed 

and dresser

and quite possibly a million other things for my house that I have always needed but never knew existed until I found them in the $1 bin at Ikea.  

By the way I was all gung-ho about the dark furniture trend until I decided I just didn't like how it makes my entire house look dark. I also just purchased a brand new chocolate brown sofa and I need the other furniture to be light and airy next to it so it doesn't weigh the room down too much. I have also been craving girlie romantic rooms with light grays and lavenders and some yellows thrown in for good measure. I am going to be painting my entire house during Spring Break with my boyfriend so I will make sure to post before and after photos on here. 

Have any spring cleaning planned for well, spring? 

Organizing those closets? 

Cleaning out that cabinet once and for all?